Six Boys, Six Girls, and Six Losses
October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. In honor of the families who have experienced this devastating grief, I am dusting off and slightly editing a couple of old posts published under the theme of Letting Go Gracefully.
Six times I've known the joy of conceiving followed by the pain of loss.
I've had six.
Six times I've known the joy of conceiving followed by the pain of loss. Miscarriage demands a letting go that devastates some of the deepest places of my heart.
Brad and I are pro-life. For us, that stance encompasses much more than being anti-abortion. We wholeheartedly embrace life. We want to value what God says is valuable. After all, if God calls children blessing why wouldn't we want to be blessed? Really, we're just kind of greedy that way. With thankfulness, we have welcomed six boys and six girls into our family. Then there are the other six.
Miscarriage demands a letting go that devastates some of the deepest places of my heart.
We know the statistics. Miscarriage manifests itself much more often in mature moms with older eggs. From a human perspective, I am the perfect textbook example. I experienced my first pregnancy loss the month I turned 39. The last occurred at age 47.
Human reasoning aside—here is what we know:
Only God can make a baby.
He ultimately determines the outcome of each pregnancy. Old eggs and statistics both bow to His command.
Each conception introduces a soul into eternity—a priceless treasure made in the image of God.
So what do we do with this? We thank God. We celebrate. And sometimes we grieve.
Did He orchestrate conception? Thank Him for doing what only He can do. Recognize the blessing. Revel in reverence. Throw a pregnancy party.
Did He ordain a short life in the womb instead of a lifetime of rearing and relationship? Praise Him and grieve—simple to say, but agonizingly difficult to do.
We can explore more of the celebrating and grieving later. Both are part of letting go gracefully. But the biggest measure of grace comes in knowing one inescapable truth: God always chooses well.
Six and six and six. We're all in good hands.
Originally Published 10-14-14
